Premediated responses….we have a choice.
“I’m going to go off on them…”
The above statement is sadly one that we hear many times when conflict arises. This idiom has become so common that there are actually definitions of it on the internet. The Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English defines “…going off on someone…” as to criticize or speak to someone in a very angry way.
Going off on someone many times is a premediated response. For instance, if so and so says this or if they come in here with that attitude “I’m going to go off on them…” That’s a premediated choice; we have already decided what our response will be beforehand and sadly many times we long for and seek out the opportunity to unleash this wrath upon our prey.
Why?
We have a choice in regards to our words and actions. This is not to suggest that we compromise truth and conviction but rather we make wise decisions in how we respond. To criticize or speak to someone in anger only escalates the issue, to do so from a premediated mindset is even worse. We all may respond in anger from time to time as a result of losing our temper which is not right but understandable. However, when we’ve had time to think of how we will respond and our plan is “…to go off on someone…” and then we look for an opportunity to execute our plan, that may say more about our heart than the person we are unleashing our wrath on. Consider the following Proverbs in an effort to help us all grow.
(KJV) It is an honor for a man to cease from strife: but every fool will be meddling. (Proverbs 20:3)
(CEV) If you are foolishly bragging or planning something evil, then stop it now! If you churn milk you get butter; if you pound on your nose, you get blood— and if you stay angry, you get in trouble. (Proverbs 30:32-33)